It's not a necklace around your neck. It's a chain.

The Department of Homeland Security has been investigating for weeks whether airport screeners were tipped off in advance about upcoming security checks. Now NBC News is reporting that those tipoffs may have come from high officials in the department.

Rep. Bennie Thompson (D-MS), chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee, recently revealed an email sent by a senior official at the Transportation Security Administration giving screeners all over the country very specific details about what sorts of suspicious clues the undercover testers would expect them to notice -- such as ID's with photos that did not match the people using them and boarding passes with altered dates.

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The purpose of the airport "security" is not to detect bombs or to otherwise make you safe. It is to regiment your behavior and to train you to act like slaves.

The reason why the procedures do not reliably detect security threats is because they are not designed to do that. They are designed for something else.

If a man gives me a gift of a strange-looking device with a lens and a tripod and an antenna sticking out of it, and tells me that it is a new kind of steak cooker, and that you cook the steak by draping it over the top of the device so that the scant heat from it will cook the steak, but if it never seems to cook the steak very well, I may safely assume that:

1. It's the worst-designed newfangled steak cooker in the world, or
2. It's been designed for something else.

In this case, the "steak cooker" is actually a wireless video camera that the man has tricked me into accepting into my home. It's designed not for cooking steak, but for spying on me.

The airport "security" measures are not designed to protect you. They are designed to make you act like East Germans during the Cold War.

So when the "security" measures fail to detect "security threats" (which is no surprise, since they are not designed for that,) DHS officials will notify airport screeners of the methods by which they may more successfully detect "security threats" during the pop inspections.

DHS officials are trying to make their spy camera look more like a steak cooker.

Wake up, my little Dream Children. You are being enslaved.

Moreover, Michael Chertoff is not the selfless defender of the people he claims to be; he is a common criminal. His job is to place the chain around your neck on behalf of his penny-shining masters.

And he's convinced you that the chain is a stunning five-point Diamelle(R) necklace.

...And you sure look pretty...